IIC2

Subject: The Wall
Three guys, a Canadian, Osama bin Ladin and Uncle Sam are out walking together one day.
They come across a lantern and a Genie pops out of it. "I will give each of you each one wish, that's three wishes total," says the Genie.
The Canadian says, "I am a farmer, my dad was a farmer, and my son will also farm. I want the land to be forever fertile in Canada.
" With a blink of the Genie's eye, 'POOF' the land in Canada was forever made fertile for farming.
Osama bin Ladin was amazed, so he said, "I want a wall around Afghanistan, so that no infidels, Jews or Americans can come into our precious state.
" Again, with a blink of the Genie's eye, 'POOF' there was a huge wall around Afghanistan.
"Uncle Sam" (A former civil engineer), asks, "I'm very curious. Please tell me more about this wall."
The Genie explains, "Well, it's about 15,000 feet high, 500 feet thick and completely surrounds the country; nothing can get in or out---virtually impenetrable."
"Uncle Sam" says, "Fill it with water."

Subject: Original speech The way Bush originally wrote his speech:
     Good evening my fellow Americans. First, I want to pass on my condolences to the people of New York and all Americans that are hurting in this tragic time. You can rest assured that anything and everything that can be done to assure the safety of our country will be done.
     This is the greatest country in the world and we will get through this trying time. Now is the time for all people to set aside our petty differences and show the world that no one or nothing can destroy the fortitude of the American people.
     To the people responsible for today's tragedy, I say this: Are you f---ing kidding me? Are the turbans on your heads wrapped too tight? Have you gone too long without a bath? Do you not know who you are f---ing with? Americans are so hungry to kill, that we shoot at each other every day. We will relish that opportunity for new targets for our aggression. Have you forgotten history?
     What happened to the last people that started f---ing around with us? Remember the little yellow bastards over in Japan? We slapped them all over the Pacific and roasted about 2 million of them in their own back yard. That's what we in America call a big ass barbecue.
     Ever seen Texas on a map? Ever wonder why it's so big? Because we wanted it that way, Mexico started jacking around with the Alamo and now they cut our lawns. England? We sent them packing.
     Ask your buddy Saddam about f---ing with the good 'ole USA. The only reason he got away the first time is because it's too hard to shoot someone when you're doubled over laughing at them. Our soldiers aren't trained to laugh and shoot at the same time. Now he couldn't stop a pack of cub scouts from taking over his shitty little country.
     Trust us, Afghanistan will end up a giant kitty litter box. Go ahead and try to hide, Bin Laden. There's not a hole deep enough or a mountain high enough that's going to keep your camel riding asses safe. We will bomb every inch of the country that harbors him, his camps and any place that looks and even smells like he was there. Hell, we might even drop a few bombs on people that have pissed us off in the past. This is America. We kick ass. This is what we do.
     Go ahead and laugh now, but the Tomahawks are coming and we will smoke your sorry asses. God bless America! ****

BACK to 911 America Under Siege

Col.TonyKern, ret.	HISTORY	Forgotten
Consider this	Patton	Vietnam
Horowitz	AGENT DM2	JOKES
Ground Zero	AGent IIC1	JOKES 2
Unanswered	Wrath of RWB	Do your Duty