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Nude Secret Weapon
The President has asked that we unite for a common cause. Since the
hard line Islamic people cannot stand nudity and consider it a sin
to see a naked woman that is not their wife, so, all women
should run out of their house naked to help weed out the terrorists.
The United States appreciates your efforts, and applauds you.
God Bless America!
Subject: Whoop-ass
September 12, 2001
Dear Osama Bin Laden, Yasser Arafat, and Sadam Hussein, et. al.,
We are pleased to announce that we unequivocally accept your challenge to
an old-fashioned game of whoop-ass. Now that we understand the rule that
there are no rules, we look forward to playing by them for the first time.
Since this game is a winner-take-all, we unfortunately are unable to invite you
to join us at the victory celebration. But rest assured that we will toast you
-- LITERALLY.
While we will admit that you are off to an impressive lead, it is however now
our turn at the plate. By the way, we will be playing on your diamond now.
Batter up. Our team line up is:
Manager.....George W. Bush
Head Coach.....Colin Powell
Assistant Coach.....D. Rumsfeld
Bat Girl........Condoleezza Rice
Starting Pitcher.......Lead off hitter...Gen. Richard B. Myers
1st Base........Marine Corps.....Air and Ground
1st Base Coach......George Tenet
2nd Base........U S Navy Air Wing...Ships don't work well in sand
Shortstop and clean up hitter........U S Air Force
3rd Base and Outfield.........Combined U S Forces of military
3rd Base Coach.....Lt. Gen. Michael V. Hayden
Pinch hitters as needed......Navy SEALS, Army Special Forces, Delta Force
Fans.....The Northern Alliance
You may choose whoever you want for your team...It ain't gonna matter.
Sincerely, Rogue, US Citizen on behalf of The 270,000,000
citizens of the United States of America
 
Subject:
Former Commandant of the Marine Corps on Berets....
Date: Tue, 4 Sep 2001 07:03:08 -0400
Former CMC General Shoup On Berets
I think it is a sign of the times...the so called leadership is so far out of
touch, they think that a beret will make a difference. The USAF tried to improve
pilot retention by issuing WW2 type leather jackets to all pilots...didn't work,
this won`t either. About 40 years ago it was suggested to USMC Commandant David
Shoup, that perhaps the Marines should adopt beret. General Shoup`s reply was
" Why would anyone want to look like a faggot or a Frenchman?"
Subject: A SHORT NOTE TO THE ENEMY!!!
A MESSAGE FOR BIN LADEN
Osama Bin Laden, your time is short;
We'd rather you die, than come to court.
Why are you hiding if it was in God's name?
You're just a punk with a turban; a pathetic shame.
I have a question, about your theory and laws;
"How come you never die for the cause?"
Is it because you're a coward who counts on others?
Well, here in America, we stand by our brothers.
As is usual, you failed in your mission;
If you expected pure chaos, you can keep on wishing'
Americans are now focused and stronger than ever;
Your death has become our next endeavor.
What you tried to kill, doesn't live in our walls;
It's not in buildings or shopping malls.
If all of our structures came crashing down;
It would still be there, safe and sound.
Because pride and courage can't be destroyed;
Even if the towers leave a deep void.
We'll band together and fill the holes
We'll bury our dead and bless their souls.
But then our energy will focus on you;
And you'll feel the wrath of the Red, White and Blue.
So slither and hide like a snake in the grass;
Because America's coming to kick your ass!!!
Subject: How the Binch stole September
THE BINCH STORY
Every U down in Uville liked U.S. a lot,
But the Binch, who lived Far East of Uville, did not.
The Binch hated U.S.! the whole U.S. way!
Now don't ask me why, for nobody can say,
It could be his turban was screwed on too tight.
Or the sun from the desert had beaten too bright
But I think that the most likely reason of all
May have been that his heart was two sizes too small.
But, Whatever the reason, his heart or his turban,
He stood facing Uville, the part that was urban.
"They're doing their business," he snarled from his perch.
"They're raising their families! They're going to church!
They're leading the world, and their empire is thriving,
I MUST keep the S's and the U's from surviving!"
Tomorrow, he knew, all the U's and the S's,
Would put on their pants and their shirts and their dresses,
They'd go to their offices, playgrounds and schools,
And abide by their U. and S. values and rules,
And then they'd do something he liked least of all,
Every U. down in U-ville, the tall and the small,
Would stand all united, each U. and each S.,
And they'd sing Uville's anthem, "God bless us! God bless!"
All around their Twin Towers of Uville, they'd stand,
and their voices would drown every sound in the land.
"I must stop that singing," Binch said with a smirk,
And he had an idea--an idea that might work!
The Binch stole some U. airplanes in U. morning hours,
And crashed them right into the Uville Twin Towers.
"They'll wake to disaster!" he snickered, so sour,
"And how can they sing when they can't find a tower?"
The Binch cocked his ear as they woke from their sleeping,
All set to enjoy their U.-wailing and weeping,
Instead he heard something that started quite low,
And it built up quite slow, but it started to grow--
And the Binch heard the most unpredictable thing...
And he couldn't believe it--they started to sing!
He stared down at U.-ville, not trusting his eyes,
What he saw was a shocking, disgusting surprise!
Every U. down in U.-ville, the tall and the small,
Was singing! Without any towers at all!
He HADN'T stopped U.-Ville from singing! It sung!
For down deep in the hearts of the old and the young,
Those Twin Towers were standing, called Hope and called Pride,
And you can't smash the towers we hold deep inside.
So we circle the sites where our heroes did fall,
With a hand in each hand of the tall and the small,
And we mourn for our losses while knowing we'll cope,
For we still have inside that U.-Pride and U.-Hope.
For America means a bit more than tall towers,
It means more than wealth or political powers,
It's more than our enemies ever could guess,
So may God bless America! Bless us! God bless!
BOOKSAMILLION.COM
ALERT
A request to all military personnel going overseas to fight the terrorists.
Dip all your bullets and bombs in the blood and fat of pigs.
DON'T LAUGH
Pointing a gun into the face of Islamic terrorists won't make them flinch.
They welcome the chance to die for Allah.
Terrorists need to be terrorized, they will see that they would be contaminated
with hogs' blood.
This would mean that they could not enter Heaven, even if they died as
terrorist martyrs. We must show them that they won't get to Muslim heaven (which
they believe has
an endless supply of virgins) but instead will die with the hated pigs of the
devil.
No Moslem worth his salt would want to die in this fashion from the blood or fat
of a pig!
Please read our alert and pass it on to
any military personal going overseas to fight terrorists.
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